


I Am Aching Now, To Let You In

by Stark-N-Barnes (StarSpangledBucky)



Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Arguing, Assassination Attempt(s), Breaking Up & Making Up, Bucky Barnes & Natasha Romanov Friendship, Bucky Barnes & Sam Wilson Friendship, Bucky Barnes & Steve Rogers Friendship, Bucky Barnes's Metal Arm, Emotional Hurt, Falling In Love, Flashbacks, Fluff, Gunshot Wounds, Happy Ending, Hospitals, Implied Sexual Content, James "Rhodey" Rhodes & Tony Stark Friendship, Language, Love Confessions, M/M, Misunderstandings, Pepper Potts & Tony Stark Friendship, S.H.I.E.L.D Agent/s, Sparring, This Is An AU After All, Tony Stark Still Has Arc Reactor, Tony's Nanotech Makes An Appearance, Undercover, Watch Your Profanity, date, injuries
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-31
Updated: 2018-05-31
Packaged: 2019-05-16 12:31:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 17,574
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14811435
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StarSpangledBucky/pseuds/Stark-N-Barnes
Summary: When Bucky Barnes is assigned undercover as Tony Stark's new PA, the last thing he expects to happen is falling for him in the process. He doesn't expect the heartache that it would bring either.





	I Am Aching Now, To Let You In

**Author's Note:**

  * For [kenshincha](https://archiveofourown.org/users/kenshincha/gifts).



> Winteriron Spring Fling gift fic for kenshincha. I used the prompt "MCU AU. Bucky (reformed Winter Soldier or plain agent) is assigned undercover as Tony's new PA once Pepper is promoted to CEO. He complains to fellow agents (Steve, Nat, Sam etc) about Tony all the time. That doesn't stop him from falling for him though." and worked from there. 
> 
> I hope you enjoy, it was such a pleasure to write this fic :)
> 
> The title is from the song Hurricane by Fleurie

Bucky hated having bitter coffee. But given that he was already late for work, he had to suffer with what he had, after not asking for sugar. The taste made his face screw up, as he tried to shake it off, while jogging across the pedestrian crossing, narrowly missed a few people who weren’t paying attention. It was only one of the many things Bucky had to do, on a daily basis, minus weekends, unless necessary. Being a S.H.I.E.L.D agent was a very demanding job, yet one that Bucky became passionate about, especially if it meant helping others. He was slowly rising up the ranks to become a second in command like Steve, who’d been with S.H.I.E.L.D a little longer than he had.

Stark Tower was near his route to the S.H.I.E.L.D building, so Bucky took a moment to admire the structure, as he did everyday. He didn’t know much about Tony Stark who lived there, only that the interior of the building would pique Bucky’s artistic mind. Before even joining S.H.I.E.L.D, he’d studied to be an interior designer, held a job for four years, then decided to try something new. His initial intentions weren’t to become an agent for security agency, but hearing stories from Steve seemed to sway him. If anything, it took him on a new journey, instigated by his prominent and adventurous nature.

After a few more minutes of intently staring at Stark Tower, Bucky turned away, then continued on his way to S.H.I.E.L.D. He stopped by his favourite bakery to grab a pastry, only having a quick chat to the owner, as time continued to slip away. Sam was going to call him up on it, but would likely let him go with a warning, since it was only the _first_ time he’d been late. Bucky could’ve used every excuse in the book to get away with it, but he wasn’t in high school anymore. He was generally truthful to his mistakes, his mother taught him well, which only resonated in his personality because of it.

As he jogged up the stairs to the front entrance of S.H.I.E.L.D, the brunette chugged the rest of his coffee, much to his detest, then threw it in the trash. He tucked the pastry into the pocket on the inside of his jacket, before walking through the revolving door to the main lobby. Bucky fished his ID out from his backpack, swiped it through the scanner and passed through to the elevators. While walking around the corner, he bumped into a shorter, scrawnier body, prompting his reflexes to reach out and grab whoever it was. He was met with silence when his eyes finally focused on a brunette teenager, who appeared as shocked as he did.

“Woah, you have a metal arm? That is awesome dude!”

Bucky let go of the brunette’s shirt, his brows knitting together as he sized him up. He must’ve been around fifteen or sixteen, and it wasn’t normal for Bucky to see teenagers past the lobby. Most of the agents had families, so occasionally their teenage kids would show up to greet them there. But the one standing before him had a guest ID around his neck, as well as a notebook clutched in his hand.

“What the hell? You’re not allowed past the lobby kid,” he said.

“I have a guest ID. I’m Peter Parker.”

Peter held his hand out towards Bucky, who took it in a firm grasp.

“Bucky Barnes.”

“So uh...any chance you could show me to where I’m supposed to go?” Peter asked.

Bucky sighed deeply.

“Sure. I dunno’ why you’re here, but there has to be a reason why you were allowed through.”

“Does every other teenager that walks in here have to wait in the lobby?” the brunette replied.

“Yeah. A lot of the agents here have families, most of ‘em teenagers. But, we can’t just go throwin’ ID’s out to everyone,” Bucky explained.

Peter nodded as they walked into the elevator together, his eyes carefully scanning the floor numbers on his left.

“Um, which floor are you going to?”

“Top floor,” the brunette answered.

“Me too.”

Bucky raised an eyebrow.

“Did you get clearance?”

“Yes, that’s what the ID says, access to all floors,” Peter said.

“Who’re you here to see?”

“Uh...Sam Wilson,” he murmured, while looking at a page in his notebook.

“What? Really?” Bucky uttered.

“It’s what it says here.”

Peter held out a sheet of paper for Bucky to take, keeping his gaze downcast. Bucky read over the letter intently, concluding that it was in fact a personal letter from Sam. It stated that Peter would be allowed to join Sam at S.H.I.E.L.D for an interview, and also a tour of the facilities. Sam even took the time to sign it and fill Peter in with the details on how to ask for an ID to get into the building. A wave of guilt washed over Bucky for sounding so pushy as to why Peter was there at all.

“Hey, I’m sorry if I sounded pushy. We just take security seriously here,” he said.

“It’s alright. I should’ve explained it better.”

Bucky shook his head.

“No, it’s my fault, really.”

Peter smiled slightly.

“So, how’d you get the metal arm?”

Bucky’s jaw clenched tightly.

“I don’t really like talkin’ about it.”

“Oh. That’s cool, I get it. Sorry,” Peter apologised.

“My turn to ask a question?”

Peter let out a snort.

“I guess,” he chuckled.

“What’s your interview for?” Bucky queried.

He smiled softly at the way Peter’s face lit up when he asked the question.

“For school, they want us to interview somebody and write an article about them. I really wanted to interview the director of S.H.I.E.L.D.”

“You wanna’ be an agent when you finish school?” the brunette replied.

“I’m...thinking about it.”

Bucky nodded and gently clapped his hand on Peter’s back.

“I’ll be honest with ya kid, there’s trying moments when you wanna’ be an agent. But it’s worth it in the end.”

“What do you like most about the job?” Peter questioned.

“Helping other people. It's rewarding when we’re out in the field, and you know you've saved people from a dangerous situation.”

“Could I maybe...y’know, put that in my article, and get your picture for it too? Only if it's cool with you,” he suggested, nervously.

“Sure, after you've interviewed Sam and had your tour of the building,” Bucky chimed.

Peter clasped his hand together, then pressed them to his forehead, before pulling them back, his fingers raking through his hair.

“Holy shit. Thank you, this is amazing!”

“Woah, watch your swearin’ here pal,” the brunette lectured.

“Sorry.”

Bucky smirked while he bit back a laugh.

“I'm just kiddin’ Peter, I swear a lot when I'm at work.”

Suddenly, the elevator jolted to a halt, as the doors opened slowly to reveal the top floor. Peter’s eyes widened a fraction at the computers and tech spread out around the room, each station having at least one or two S.H.I.E.L.D agents near them. Bucky stepped out, then turned back to usher Peter out of the elevator with a wave of his hand.

“C’mon kid, Sam’s this way.”

“I-wow,” Peter gushed.

“I know, me too when I first arrived here.”

“I just...I need to get pictures of this. Can you hang on a second? Please,” he begged.

“Sure thing,” Bucky hummed.

He stood to the side to let Peter take his photos, idly watching the activity going on in the room behind the glass screen. Peter looked away from his camera for a moment, before turning himself around to face Bucky and steadying it in his hands. The shutter clicked loudly, drawing Bucky's attention away from the agents, brow creasing, as Peter flashed him a wide smile.

“Sorry, you just looked really focused and I thought it'd be a good picture for the article.”

“Hmph, you're gonna’ go places Parker,” the brunette commented. “C’mon, Sam’s in here,” he added, pointing in the direction of a narrow hallway.

Peter followed close behind, almost bumping into Bucky when he stopped abruptly in front of a door, his eyes scanning over the plaque on it.

_Sam Wilson - Director of S.H.I.E.L.D_

Bucky rapped his knuckles against the door, sharply.

“Come in.”

After opening the door, Bucky's hand flew out to catch a book, his gaze snapping over to Steve who stood near the bookcase in Sam’s office. Steve grinned and waved another book at Bucky, only to have the brunette flip him off in response.

“Agent Barnes, you're late.”

Natasha snorted, from where she sat lounged in one of the arm chairs.

“You're in _trouble,_ he used your formal title.”

“Buck, you're _never_ late. You go on a hot date last night?” Steve teased.

Bucky lightly punched Steve in the shoulder.

“Fuck you Rogers.”

“Man, I'm gonna’ have to write you up for this you know that right?” Sam interjected.

“I know. I'm sorry. I ain't gonna’ make excuses. If it's any help though, I brought Peter up here with me.”  

Sam raised an eyebrow, then glanced over Bucky's shoulder to see Peter.

“Hi I'm Parker. I mean-Peter...Parker. Yeah...”

Natasha’s mouth curved up at the corner.

“I didn't know we were expecting a student today.”

Sam crossed his arms loosely over his chest.

“That's because I didn't tell any of you. Peter’s here to interview me for a school article, then he's getting a tour of the facility. Which I'm gonna’ give to you Barnes, for being late.”

“Oh c’mon I gotta’ work through paperwork today!” Bucky protested.

“Rogers can do a handful.”

Steve shrugged.

“Sure.”

“You traitor, you're supposed to be on my side,” the brunette joked.

“I have to interview Bucky too, so that works,” Peter stated.

“Wait a minute, Barnes too?” Natasha murmured.

“Well, I could add you too, the more people the better the article. Uh...Miss-” he paused.

“Just call me Natasha. I'm the commander. Steve is second in command if you want to interview him too,” she offered.

Peter nodded thoughtfully.

“I'd be great to get so many different perspectives.”

Natasha pushed herself up from the chair she sat in, before turning to face Sam.

“Permission to take Peter to the break room while you and Rogers talk to Barnes, sir.”

“Permission granted, bring him back in half an hour. We’ll do the interviews, then a tour,” Sam instructed.

Bucky looked between Natasha and Sam.

“What do you need to talk to me about?”

Sam stole a glance at Bucky.

“You'll see.”

Natasha held her hand out, before resting it lightly on Peter’s shoulder.

“Follow me. Mom and dad need to talk with their son first.”

“Nat,” Steve groaned, as her and Peter quickly left the room.

“So what's up Pops,” Bucky chided, while nudging Steve's arm.

Sam laughed.

“Hey man, if anything _I'm_ the dad.”

Steve shook his head and Bucky elicited a snort.

“So...what did you wanna’ talk to me about?” he asked.

Sam placed his hand down on a folder, then slid it across his desk towards Bucky. The brunette stepped forward and skimmed his fingers along the edge of the folder, before flipping it open. He scanned the contents to see pages of information, as well as some photos sticking out from under them. Bucky pushed the pages aside to look at the photos, his eyes narrowing slightly.

“Is that…”

“Tony Stark, yeah,” Sam answered.

“I don't understand what this has gotta’ do with me.”

“It has _everythin’_ to do with you now,” he informed.

Bucky's lips were pressed into a thin line, before he stared at Sam.

“Tell me what this is,” he demanded, as he jabbed his finger down on the photo.

Sam sighed deeply.

“We’re sending you undercover to be Tony Stark’s new PA.”

Bucky stared back at Sam in disbelief.

“I’m a _S.H.I.E.L.D agent,_ Sam, not a PA.”

“A lot of agents go on undercover missions Bucky. Nat’s done several,” Steve interjected.

“Well why isn’t she doin’ this?”

Sam shook his head and sunk down into his seat.

“Because she’s on her way to Helsinki tomorrow for a mission.”

“What about Steve?” Bucky retorted.

“No, since my commander will be gone, I need someone with me. Steve stays here, as second in command I’m gonna’ need his assistance.”

“I thought Virginia Potts was his PA,” he muttered.

Steve appeared mildly offended at Bucky’s lack of keeping up with the times.

“Do you even watch TV these days Buck?”

Bucky set his jaw tight.

“I watch Netflix after I take Quinn for a walk.”

Steve pinched the bridge of his nose.

“But you don’t see ad breaks or news reports on Netflix.”

The brunette pointed at Steve with a smug grin.

“Exactly.”

Sam elicited a soft chuckle and rested a hand on his knee, while he shook his head.

“Pepper Potts is now CEO of Stark Industries. It was announced over a month ago.”

“Wow I'm really outta’ the loop,” Bucky muttered.

“So, with her running the business, Stark has no PA. That's where you come in.”

“Isn't he a grown man? I'm sure he doesn't need a PA to help,” he commented.

“It's not about _that,_ ” Sam replied.

“Then what is it? C’mon Sam, give me details!”

“Concerns about his health and safety,” he said.

“He's _Iron Man!_ ”

Sam’s face looked everything but amused.

“I swear man, you're so naive sometimes. We’re aware. But he lives alone, sometimes Pepper visits, and his best friend James Rhodes. Other than that, he has an AI, named Jarvis, and his bots. Pepper thinks it would be good for him if somebody else was there...like a new PA.”

“Hold on, so Pepper knows we’re S.H.I.E.L.D right, a security agency. Why not ask for a bodyguard?” Bucky questioned.

“No, she doesn't know, and neither will Stark, or anyone else who he associates with. That's why you're _undercover._ You're just a PA, nothin’ else.”

“It sounds like I’m gonna’ be his babysitter,” the brunette groused.

Steve’s hand clasped Bucky’s shoulder, tightly.

“Buck, he’s known to go a little overboard with alcohol sometimes. His uh...last birthday party was a bit of a disaster.”

Bucky nodded slowly.

“So what you mean by Pepper thinking it’d be good for another person to be there...you mean I have to stay at Stark Tower?”

“That’s exactly what we mean,” Sam answered.

“You’re jokin’ right.”

“No. Just weekdays, you’re free to go home during the weekend,” he reasoned.

“You know I can’t leave Quinn,” Bucky argued.

Sam leant back in his chair, with his arms crossed loosely over his chest.

“Take her with you. We’ll notify Pepper, she’ll then notify Tony. It won’t be a big deal.”

Bucky dropped his head back with a groan.

“You don’t even know that. He could hate dogs for all we know!”

“You obviously missed the calender Tony did for charity...with puppies,” Sam retorted.

“No, I saw it. I loved the one for my birth month...with the labrador.”

Sam dropped his head into his hands.

“It was a great dane.”

“Right. That’s what I was going to say, but I didn’t,” Bucky chuckled, softly.

“Bucky, if anything isn’t working for you, then you let me know and I’ll send in another agent.”

The brunette pondered the thought for a moment, before he lightly slapped his hand against his thigh.

“Alright, fine. I’ll do it. But I’m freely allowed to complain if he bothers me.”

“Yeah, well, you can bother Steve and Nat with that,” Sam said.

Steve gasped.

“Hey, throwin’ me under the bus!”

Bucky snorted.

“Stevie you’re always the best listener.”

“I’m touched,” the blonde teased, with his hand laying on his chest.

“Punk,” Bucky muttered.

Steve smirked.

“Jerk.”

“Alright listen Bucky, I’m gonna’ be sending more files for you to read over about Stark, you need to at least be prepared for him throwing any questions at you. I’ll send them through while you take Peter for his tour,” Sam informed.

“Right, still gotta’ do that, since I was late.”

“You seem to get along well with the kid, you’ll be fine,” he drawled, as Bucky nodded in understanding.

“Well, I guess I’ll grab this file...and take Peter for that tour. Steve you can pick whatever paperwork you want from my desk,” the brunette replied.

“Thanks Buck.”

Bucky gave the blonde a small nod, then exited the room to go in search of Peter. He wandered down the hallway to the break room, with the file tucked tightly under his arm. But he stopped abruptly, in favour of opening the file again, casting his eyes of the photos of Tony again. It was funny how he kept wondering what Stark Tower would look like when he passed it everyday, now he was _actually_ going to see it. And he was going to be around Tony Stark, undercover, for as long as Sam wanted him to be.

“What the hell am I getting myself into?”

* * *

_“Sir, Miss Potts is here to see you.”_

Tony turned his attention away from the suit he was working on, as Pepper walked through the door of the workshop. He placed his tools to the side, before standing up and making his way over to her.

“Pep, I wasn’t expecting to see you today.”

Pepper smiled, then kissed Tony on the cheek, after embracing him warmly.

“I wasn’t planning it but something came up.”

“Oh? What is it?” Tony asked.

“Well, because I’m no longer your PA, I searched around and found somebody else to take over those duties.”

“I manage fine on my own,” the brunette said.

“You’re working on it. But you could do better,” Pepper replied.

Tony frowned back at her.

“First of all, ouch. And second, I really don’t need a new personal assistant, I have everything in check.”

“I know that you haven’t been okay,” she sighed.

“Who told you that?”

Pepper pressed her dark red lips into a thin line.

“Rhodey did. He knows things haven’t been easy since Vanko, and since you almost died from palladium poisoning, because of this.”

She tapped her finger lightly against the arc reactor in Tony’s chest.

“This is new and improved Pep. No toxins going into my body anymore,” Tony assured her.

“He told me that you wake up in the middle of the night after dreaming about it.”

“Oh c’mon. I’m _fine,_ ” he muttered.

“Tony, part of me trusts you, and the other part doesn’t. You’re still struggling with alcohol too,” Pepper said.

Tony dropped his gaze to the floor.

“And having a PA will fix that?”

“They can help you through it. You hate to admit it, but you do get lonely, Tony,” she added.

The brunette shrugged his shoulders as he looked back at his Iron Man suit.

“Sometimes.”

Pepper rested her hand on Tony’s back and rubbed small circles near his shoulder.

“He’s a highly recommended PA, apparently he’s very reliable.”

“What’s his name?” Tony questioned.

“James Barnes, but he prefers the name Bucky. He’s thirty four, from Brooklyn but he lives in Manhattan now.”

“So, how is this going to work? Does he show up at my door every morning to start his PA work and throw me off my routine,” he chided. 

“No, he’s going to be staying here, except weekends,” Pepper answered.

Tony gawked at Pepper.

“Don’t. You have a guest room for him to stay in,” she pointed out.

“I know, but this my space.”

Pepper shook her head slightly.

“You and I shared space for a year and you didn’t complain.”

Tony sighed deeply.

“But I knew you before that. I know _nothing_ about this...Bucky.”

The brunette watched the corner of Pepper’s mouth curve up.

“Get to know him then. Also, he has a dog, she’s staying too.”

“Is she a big dog or a little dog? You know I’m okay with dogs, but sometimes they’re really…hyper,” Tony murmured.

“Quinn is apparently very docile, calm and is a great guard dog.”

“I guess that’s a bonus,” he said.

“If it makes you feel any better you get to do an assessment of him,” Pepper reasoned.

Tony’s brow rose.

“Oh.”

“It’s so the company he works for knows that he’s doing a good job. You have total control over how you assess him,” she hummed.

“Now you are speaking my language Pep.”

Pepper smiled softly.

“So, you’ll give him a chance?”

_“Mr Stark, there’s someone downstairs requesting entry to the building.”_

Pepper’s eyes lit up.

“Oh, that’ll be Bucky!”

Tony brought up a hologram in front of him to display the camera in the lobby. Bucky’s back was turned to the camera, but that didn’t stop Tony’s eyes from roaming. He swallowed thickly at the way Bucky’s suit accentuated the shape of his body, the jacket seeming a little too tight on his biceps. It was a nice suit too, Tom Ford, Tony’s favourite brand. In fact...he thought Bucky looked so much better in it than he did.

“Jarvis, let him up please,” Pepper spoke up.

When Bucky turned around at the sound of the elevator opening, Tony got a good look at his face, which only made things worse. Bucky was _stunning,_ brunette hair hanging loosely at his shoulders, neat stubble and bright blue-grey eyes. Tony felt somewhat underdressed, and too distracted by staring that he failed to notice Pepper was already making her way upstairs.

“Pepper!” he called.

“Come on Tony, we need to welcome him.”

Tony swiped the hologram away.

“Shit.”

He hurried over to the stairs that would take him to the main floor of Stark Tower, where he generally inhabited in the morning, alone. Tony jogged after Pepper, who was always five steps ahead of him, panic swelling inside his chest.

“Pep, you didn’t tell me you were hiring a supermodel as my PA!”

“What are you talking about?” Pepper laughed.

“Have you seen him! He’s straight out of a GQ magazine, and I’m feeling very underdressed. I look like a slob!” the brunette exclaimed.

“Tony, this isn’t The Bachelor, he’s not looking for good first impressions.”

The brunette grunted.

“I wish it _was_ The Bachelor because I would be giving Mr Handsome PA a rose!”

“You look fine,” Pepper commented.

“You’re used to my slob form. He could be someone who looks for good first impressions you never know,” Tony retorted.

“Tony, please try and be professional, he’s going to be your PA,” she scolded.

“Right, wouldn't want people talking,” he mumbled.

They arrived on the main floor in time to see the elevator door open, before Bucky stepped out. He placed a duffel bag and suitcase to the side, as his gaze fell on Pepper and Tony.

“Miss Potts, Mr Stark,” Bucky greeted.

Pepper smiled warmly.

“Hi, Mr Barnes. Welcome.”

“Please, call me Bucky. Formality isn't really my thing, unless I'm talkin’ to my boss, clients or the higher ups,” he chimed.

“Bucky it is then.”

Tony held back a grunt when Pepper gently nudged him in the ribs.

“Welcome to Stark Tower, Bucky.”

Bucky returned a small nod in his direction.

“Thank you, Mr Stark.”

Tony’s brow scrunched up.

“I really dislike the formality thing too. Call me Tony.”

“I'm not authorised to address you that way,” Bucky replied.

“Well, I'm authorising it. Seriously, call me Mr Stark if we’re ever out in public or your boss drops in for a surprise visit to check on you. If you're in this house, you get to call me Tony.”

Bucky’s shoulders sagged slightly.

“Alright,” he said.

“Did you change your mind about bringing your dog here?” Pepper asked.

The brunette shook his head.

“No, I'm gonna’ pick her up later. I thought it'd be easier if I came here alone, just to...familiarise myself with being here. And to unpack.”

“I cleaned out one of the guest rooms for you,” Tony interjected.

“You? Or your cleaning service.”

Pepper covered her mouth to stifle a chuckle.

“Ouch, that’s harsh Barnes,” the brunette muttered.

“I was told your inflated ego gets to you sometimes,” Bucky chided.

Tony’s eyes widened in surprise.

“Pepper, what have you been telling him?”

Bucky grinned.

“Trust me, I've heard good things too,” he answered.

“Thank you, I do have a very soft centre.”

The brunette's grin grew wider.

“I believe you.”

Pepper watched the pair intently and smiled behind her hand.

“Anyway, I’ll let you unpack. The guest room is the second one on your right,” Tony said.

Bucky nodded firmly.

“Thanks.”

Tony waited until Bucky was out of earshot, before turning to face Pepper with his hands held out at his side.

“How did I do?”

“You behaved,” she answered.

“See. I can be good.”

Pepper hummed.

“But seriously, why did you have to hire someone that’s so nice and actually makes me want to socialise?” Tony interrogated.

“I hired him because he’s good at what he does, according to his files. But if he’s making you feel sociable, that’s better. You could use human company for a longer period of time, instead of whenever Rhodey and I get a chance to visit.”

“Not that I really need it,” he said.

“Tony...for once in your life, stop worrying about other people and look after yourself instead.”

The brunette leant against the edge of the dining table, with his arms crossed over his chest.

“You really think this is going to work?”

Pepper noticed the tired expression in Tony’s eyes, even as he stared anywhere but in her direction, the dark circles becoming greater in prominence each time she visited. She walked over to the brunette and stood in front of him, then tilted his head up with her hand. Tony gave his attention to her, seeing the sympathetic smile she gave him, knowing all too well how much he’d been struggling. After Tony rested his head on her chest, with his arms wrapped around her slender frame, she cradled his head in her hands, while stroking his hair.

“I think you’ll get along great…”

* * *

It took only a week for the complaining to begin.

“He is _the_ biggest-”

Steve hummed through a mouthful of food.

“...pain in my fuckin’ ass.”

The blonde nodded lazily.

“Are you even listenin’ to me Steve?” Bucky asked.

“Huh?”

“Oh, great. Perfect, it's fine, Steve. I'll sit here talkin’ to myself,” he grunted.

“Sorry, I'm just really enjoyin’ this burger.”

Bucky rolled his eyes and sagged against the booth.

“Even if the building was on fire you'd still sit there like a dope eatin’ it.”

Steve placed his burger back down on the plate, then grabbed a napkin to wipe his mouth.

“Y’know it's only been a week,” he said.

“Thank you Captain Obvious.”

“I'm just sayin’. Have you _really_ given it a chance?” the blonde questioned.

Bucky dragged his hands down his face with an exasperated sigh.

“My sleeping pattern is fucked up because of him. It’s not every night, but he's always wakin’ up at dumb times and works in his workshop. Which happens to be right under the bedroom I sleep in. And look, I get he's a huge fan of AC/DC but if I hear _Shoot To Thrill_ on repeat again I'm going to shoot the damn stereo.”

Steve shook his head.

“So, you'll shoot Jarvis and then end up with a target on your back.”

“What?” Bucky muttered.

“Jarvis controls a lot of things inside Stark Tower, including the music. Tony doesn't have a stereo.”

“What the hell, how do you know?” the brunette scoffed.

“A friend I knew from college was going to one of Tony's charity events, I was there,” Steve replied.

Bucky picked up one of his fries and threw it at Steve.

“You lyin’ dick, you said you've never been there!”

“Buck, inside voice,” he sighed.

“Sorry. Why'd you go though?”

Steve shrugged.

“He wanted me to be his plus one.”

Bucky snorted.

“How'd Sam feel about that?” he queried.

The blonde frowned.

“We’re not-”

Bucky's eyebrows wiggled up and down.

“...shut up. There's nothin’ going on with us.”

Another fry hit Steve between the eyes.

“Sure Steve, I'll start believin’ that when there's flying cars everywhere.”

Steve’s mouth twitched up at the corner, before he looked away, with his cheeks flushed in a light shade of pink. Bucky drew in a deep breath, then exhaled.

“I'm just not used to livin’ with someone else since-”

He inhaled sharply and clutched his wrist.

“Hey,” Steve whispered, as he put his hand on Bucky's arm. “You're okay,” he added.

Bucky shook his head.

“Been on my own since then. It's somethin’ I got used to. Same for Quinn, only it took longer for her.”

Steve smiled sadly.

“Sam said if you had issues you should talk to him. But, it might be good for you Buck. Maybe not bein’ alone is what you need. Tony’s still gonna’ be struggling with what happened to him in Afghanistan. It takes years to feel some sense of healing, and you know that, ‘cause you've felt it before.”

“Steve please don't,” Bucky pleaded.

“Alright, but just consider what Tony's going through. He's going to be waking up at strange hours and finding things to take his mind off his anxiety and stress.”

“I know. It’s just hard gettin’ used to this,” he murmured.

“Give it another week pal. Then we’ll figure it out from there,” Steve offered.

Bucky nodded in agreement.

“Thanks Stevie.”

Suddenly, Bucky’s phone started ringing in his pocket, prompting him to quickly fish it out. He stared at the caller ID, before sighing and holding it up to show Steve.

“It’s him, I better get this.”

“You think it’s important?” the blonde queried.

“Probably wants me to pick up his dry cleaning or somethin’,” Bucky huffed out, as he answered the call.

_“Bucky?”_

“Mr Stark,” he responded.

_“I know you’re seeing someone you work with right now. But did you get my medication?”_

Bucky stole a glance at Steve, then looked back down at the table.

“Tony where are you, why can I hear a lot of noise?”

_“Uh...I’m outside the diner you said you were going to.”_

“Jesus fuckin’ christ. Just...stay where you are okay? I’ll be outside in a minute.”

After hanging up, Bucky pulled his wallet out from his other pocket and slapped a few bills down on the table.

“Sorry Steve, I gotta’ run.”

Steve looked up from the newspaper he was holding.

“Everythin’ alright?”

“Yeah, I’ll talk to you about it later. I really gotta’ go,” Bucky replied.

“Remember to check in with Sam later.”

“I will!” he called back, as he hurriedly walked out of the diner.

Bucky scanned the crowd for any sign of Tony, until he caught a glimpse of him standing by his car at the curb. He jogged over to the brunette, who propped his sunglasses up on top of his head, his eyes bloodshot and red.

“Hey, you okay?”

“Yeah, yeah. Fine, I just had a small panic attack on the way here,” Tony answered.

“And you _drove?_ Tony, you’re not supposed to drive in that state.”

“No Mr Stark now?” he bit back.

Bucky’s gaze fell to the ground.

“I had to make myself seem professional so my work friend didn’t get suspicious.”

Tony scoffed and shook his head.

“Do you have my medication I need to take it.”

“You asked me to get you another prescription, but I didn’t need to pick it up until 1pm,” Bucky said.

The brunette’s jaw clenched.

“Bucky, it’s almost 2pm…”

“What?” he uttered.

Bucky grabbed his phone out and looked at the time, which read quarter to two. He glanced back up at Tony, who glared back at him before swallowing thickly.

“Tony I’m so sorry.”

“Don’t. I trusted you, as my PA, to do _one_ important thing,” Tony ground out.

“I could’ve sworn I put a reminder in my phone…”

“Well you didn’t! I need that medication on a daily basis. And _you_ screwed up!” he spat.

Several pairs of eyes focused on them now after Tony raised his voice.

“Tony, people are staring,” Bucky whispered.

“I don’t care! You messed up big time! You’re supposed to be a really good PA, I took Pepper’s word for it!”

“Let me go and get the medication for you right now, please,” he reasoned.

“No, no! Screw you Barnes, I’ll get them myself!”

“You're not fit for driving!”

“And you're not fit for being my PA!” Tony yelled.

Bucky held back his words as he watched Tony get back in his car, the door slamming loudly behind him. Those who'd been staring at them went on their way as if nothing had happened. But Bucky was embarrassed... _upset_ even, the sting of Tony's words getting him where it hurt. He didn't intend to mess up, and wouldn't be surprised if Tony fired him for it. Not only that, but he'd be reprimanded by Sam for negligence, given that he seemed so sure that Bucky would do well.

“Shit,” he cursed, running a hand through his hair.

He sat down on a nearby bench, dropped his head in one hand and bit down on his bottom lip. His free hand searched for his phone, as he searched through his contacts and dialled Natasha's number. She answered on the first ring.

“Hey Nat, I really screwed up. And I just really need a friend right now…”

If anyone could give him good advice...it'd be her.

* * *

Tony took in the sight of Manhattan on the balcony the following night. He hadn’t seen Bucky since he'd yelled at him outside the diner the previous day. Bucky did come back sometime during the night, Jarvis notified him while he was working in the workshop. The brunette looked miserable, even when he greeted Quinn on the main floor. Tony knew he shouldn't have been so harsh on Bucky, it was one slip up, because, for the most part, Bucky was a huge help.

In the morning he wasn't present at breakfast, yet left a note to say he was running errands. And it showed, since Bucky went out of his way to leave reminders for Tony to take his medication, which he left out on the kitchen counter. Also, for the fact that he fixed an error in Tony's accounts that he himself had stupidly missed. Bucky was trying, and Tony was feeling sincerely grateful for it. So much so, he wanted to make up for the things he'd said to him.

The brunette sighed when he heard the elevator doors open, mostly in relief, as he hadn’t seen Bucky all day. He put his back to the view behind him and peered inside, catching sight of Bucky in his civvies, with a brown paper bag tucked under his arm. Bucky dropped his duffel bag beside the dining table, then looked around the room, before locking eyes with Tony. He waved at Tony, in a slight awkward manner, which put a small smile on Tony’s face. Bucky sauntered over to the open door and walked down the stairs, as he held up the bag.

“Peace offering.”

Tony smirked, then pointed at the table behind him.

“Uh, I also got a peace offering.”

“Shawarma?” Bucky questioned.

“Yeah.”

“The one only a few blocks away?” he replied.

The brunette nodded slowly, causing Bucky to laugh softly.

“Who would've thought we both liked the same place for food huh?”

“Next thing you're gonna’ tell me is it's something you buy every Tuesday like I do,” Tony chuckled.

Bucky looked him dead in the eye with a straight face.

“I do actually.”

“Oh,” the brunette breathed out.

The smile Bucky gave him was sheepish, as if he was uncertain on what to say next.

“I'm sorry,” they both said, in unison.

Tony laughed nervously, scratched the back of his neck, then slid his hands into the pockets of his jeans.

“Wow, that's awkward.”

“It's not. It happens,” Bucky replied.

“In rom-coms maybe.”

“You don't like rom-coms?” he asked.

“Uh, actually, I really like them. More than Pepper did,” Tony admitted.

Bucky's eyes widened a fraction.

“Get outta’ here, I love rom-coms.”

“Shit, okay, which is your favourite?” he queried.

“Honestly, I really like _Four Weddings And a Funeral._ ”

Tony shook his head in disbelief.

“Mine too, you're making it very hard to hate you Barnes.”

“Wait, you hate me?” Bucky muttered.

“No! I was joking, I didn't mean it sincerely. Though I have to tell you the truth, you're difficult to live with.”

“Yeah, so are you,” the brunette scoffed, with a grin.

“You live on your own too?” Tony countered.

Bucky sighed deeply.

“Besides havin’ Quinn with me, I do.”

“Ever get lonely?” he said.

“Now and again…”

Tony shifted his weight from one foot to the other.

“Just tell me to stop if any of this gets uncomfortable.”

Bucky lifted his head to glance at Tony.

“I wasn't always alone.”

Tony gestured over to the chairs placed by the table, offering his hand out to take the bag of shawarma from Bucky’s hands. The brunette sat down as he rubbed his palms against his jeans, before Tony sat opposite him. He opened the bags and placed their food down, with his eyes still focusing on Bucky.

“Tell me, did you do anything before you became a PA?”

“Well-” Bucky paused.

He’d dreaded the day that he would have to answer questions about himself. Sam made it very clear that he’d have to change parts of his story so not to raise suspicions with Tony. The thing Bucky hated the most was lying, but for the sake of Tony’s safety, and for his job, he couldn’t risk it.

“I was an interior designer for four years,” he confessed.

“Wow. Really? I should’ve asked for your advice when I built this place.”

Bucky smirked.

“I think it’s great how it is.”

“It’s how I like it,” Tony replied.

Bucky’s eyes darted down to the shawarma for a moment, before he took a bite from it, as a way of calming himself before the storm.

“What did you mean by what you said earlier?” the brunette asked.

“Hm?”

Tony wiped the corner of his mouth with a napkin.

“When you said you weren’t always alone.”

“Oh...uh, in Brooklyn, where I live. I used to share my apartment with one of my best friend’s. Now I just share it with Quinn.”

Quinn, who had been sleeping closeby, perked her head up at the sound of her name. Bucky smiled warmly at her in return, while Tony nodded to signal that he was listening.

“So what happened to them? They settle down and move away?”

Bucky stared back at Tony with glazed eyes, and struggled to swallow the growing lump in his throat that always showed when he tried not to cry. He could smell the burning smoke, as well as the toxic fumes hitting his nose. His metal hand clenched tightly and his throat seized up, as he was taken back to the night that almost ruined him.

_“Don’t you dare let go!”_

_“Bucky, this can’t hold both of us!”_

All he remembered after the floor collapsed from under him was falling, down, _down,_ until he hit the ground below. His partner and best friend, Agent Collins died that night, only leaving Bucky blaming himself for it.

“Hey, you’re alright.”

Bucky gasped shakily when he came back to reality, noticing that Tony was sitting in front of him now, his hands resting on the brunette’s shoulders. He covered his mouth with a trembling hand and blinked away tears that threatened to spill, not wanting to worry Tony any further.

“I’m okay…” he said, voice wavering.

“We can talk about something else.”

The brunette refused immediately.

“No. It’s fine. It happened a year ago, there was a fire, the building collapsed under us. And Alex...my best friend, he died. I got to live but he didn’t and I-I blame myself for lettin’ my grasp slip.”

“Bucky that is _not_ your fault,” Tony whispered.

“It’s how I ended up with this.”

Bucky rolled his sleeve up to his elbow, revealing more of his metal arm, then pulling back the collar of his shirt.

“It starts there and ends at my hand.”

Tony lightly touched the prosthetic, cold to the touch, but so...advanced.

“It’s a reminder.”

The brunette nodded, as a tear slid down his face, which he quickly wiped away.

“A constant one,” Bucky said.

“This is really advanced tech, how did you get something like this?”

“Someone I know. Can’t really disclose anything else about it,” he stated.

Tony’s eyes told Bucky that he understood.

“Everyday when I look at my arc reactor it’s a constant reminder too. I always think about what happened in Afghanistan, how I managed to escape. There was a scientist and surgeon with me, Dr Yinsen, he was in charge of my medical needs. He helped me make my first prototype suit so that we could escape. Then he sacrificed himself. This arc reactor is a reminder of how I managed to survive because he helped me,” he explained.

“That’s not on you Tony.”

“Neither is yours,” the brunette snapped.

Bucky clenched his jaw briefly.

“Y’know I used to think there was no escape, that there was this endless void that I had to keep runnin’ through for the rest of my life. But whenever I think about Alex, I feel emotional pain, but then it passes ‘cause I get reminded of the good times, but also the fact that he’d hate to see me like this.”

Tony leant back in his chair and exhaled a breath.

“It’ll haunt us for as long as it can. But that’s why we find closure with someone else, who knows some part of what you’re going through.”

“That’s one way of puttin’ it,” Bucky replied.

“All I’m saying is that, if you need somebody...I’m here.”

Bucky gave him a weak smile, before hanging his head a little.

“That...means a lot Tony,” he drawled.

“I know we got off on the wrong foot yesterday. But maybe we can fix that now,” Tony suggested.

“I’m sorry I forgot your medication, it won’t happen again.”

“You left me reminders today. I think that makes up for it,” he said.

Bucky chuckled as Tony stood up from his chair.

“You want a drink?”

“I’ll get ‘em,” Bucky hummed.

“No. Stay right there, enjoy your food. What’s your poison?”

“Whisky,” he answered.

The brunette couldn't help but smirk when he turned away from Bucky.

“Good choice.”

Once Tony was inside Bucky gazed out at the city the picturesque city before him. He'd never seen anything as beautiful as the nightlife, not even from his apartment. This was a dream of his, to be inside Stark Tower and see what Tony could see. For what it was worth, it was nothing compared to the beauty in Tony's smile.

Bucky realised then...that resisting Tony’s charm might be harder than he imagined.

* * *

Two weeks followed and things with Tony seemed to be looking up. Only, the more time Bucky started spending with Tony, getting to know him better, his feelings kept manifesting. Tony _is_ and _was_ the kind of guy that Bucky envisioned himself being with when he was growing up. Someone with charisma, as well as a good moral compass, was what attracted Bucky. Though there was so much more to Tony that had Bucky pining for him.

Bucky was exercising in the gym at Stark Tower, when Tony decided to enter the room, also clad in workout gear. He spared a glance Tony’s way, eyes casting over the sleeveless shirt which left his toned biceps bare. The brunette quickly turned back to the punching bag, as he wiped a loose strand of hair from his face, then proceeded to throw his fists at the bag. Tony crossed his arms over his chest, watching Bucky intently, who could sense those honey coloured eyes looking at him.

“What’re ya’ waitin’ for, a show?” he chided.

Tony smirked widely.

“Was waiting for that bag to split, but I guess not.”

“Think you can do better?” Bucky retorted.

“You want to test that theory?”

Bucky backed away from the punching bag, while taking his boxing gloves off.

“Ain’t gonna’ back down from a challenge. Name it.”

His eyes followed Tony to the far side of the room, displaying a rack of quarterstaffs leaning against the wall. Bucky raised an eyebrow as Tony picked up a red one from the rack, then a silver on, before walking back to where Bucky stood. He held the silver quarterstaff out towards Bucky, giving him a small nod and a smile.

“Ever used one of these before?” Tony asked.

“I’m usually prefer my fists.”

“It should come naturally to you. Just have to feel the staff in your hand, move your body with it, find your opponents blind spot,” he explained.

“Why did you learn to fight with these when you have your suit?” Bucky questioned.

Tony’s eyes flickered up to Bucky.

“Because I’m more than just a man in iron armour. People think I’m weak, it’s fine to have weaknesses, but I have my strengths too. I know how to fight with and without the suit.”

“Fair enough,” the brunette said, as he pulled his hair back and haphazardly tied it into a bun.

“So what’s your wager?”

Bucky narrowed his eyes.

“Huh?”

“How about this. _When_ I kick your ass, you take me to dinner,” Tony replied.

“ _When?_ How about _if._ ” Bucky scoffed.

“Don’t underestimate me Barnes,” he warned.

“You got yourself a deal. If I win it’s you takin’ me to dinner,” the brunette drawled.

Suddenly, Tony whipped around to swipe the quarterstaff under Bucky’s feet, knocking him onto his back as he gently pinned the end of the staff on the brunette’s chest.

“First rule. Don’t get distracted.”

Bucky gritted his teeth and pushed the quarterstaff to the side, before jumping into a crouch and hitting the back of Tony’s knees to make them buckle.

“Second rule. Watch your blind spots.”

Tony grinned as he took Bucky’s hand that was offered to him. He quickly dismissed it by swiftly tucking his quarterstaff under Bucky’s arm then twisted him around until his back was to him, with the staff pressed on his chest.

“Third rule. Don’t be too friendly with your opponent,” Tony whispered, his breath brushing against Bucky’s neck.

Bucky’s breath caught in his throat, which he tried to shake off, unwilling to lose focus so quickly. He forcefully pushed against Tony’s grip to loosen it, using his staff to softly jab Tony in the stomach, sending him back a few steps. Tony was already sweating, even as he flicked some of his damp hair away from his face, he still looked great.

“Focus Barnes, focus.”

Tony ran at him, dropped to his knees and slide across the polished wooden floor with ease. He swung the quarterstaff upwards, knocking Bucky’s from his grasp, with a pleased smirk on his face. Bucky’s chest rose and fell heavily as he let out a breathy chuckle, upon hearing the staff clatter on the floor.

“You forgot the fourth rule,” he murmured.

“Hm?”

Bucky pushed himself to his feet as Tony planned to attack again, throwing his metal arm out to catch the quarterstaff, catching the brunette by surprise. He hoisted himself up on Tony’s shoulders in a smooth motion, using all the strength in his legs to flip Tony down onto a soft mat. His free hand reached out for his staff and pinned the brunette down with gentle force.

“Never think you have the upper hand when someone is free of a weapon.”

Tony’s eyes widened.

“Where the hell did you learn that!” he yelled.

“My friend. Her name’s Natasha.”

Tony frowned.

“That’s really not fair.”

“I think I won though,” Bucky chuckled.

“Not exactly.”

Strong legs locked themselves around Bucky’s waist, before he was flipped onto his back, with Tony rolling off of him to get back on his feet. Bucky followed and moved into a power stance, quarterstaff held out to his side, as he gestured with his other hand for Tony to strike.

“C’mon!” Tony shouted.

The pair lunged at each other, quarterstaffs clashing in a parry, again and again. They moved around the room, forwards, backwards, sometimes to the side. Then they started moving in circles, with only a small distance between them, eyes locked in an intense stare.

“If I get you down again, you lose,” Bucky said.

The brunette aimed to catch Tony’s legs again, only to watch in bewilderment when Tony hit the middle of his own staff with his fist, splitting it into two shorter staffs. Tony ducked under Bucky’s staff as he swung again and clipped his ankle with one of the staffs, to throw him off balance. Bucky yelled in surprise as he hit the floor, his quarterstaff once again skidding to a stop on the opposite side. He attempted to move, but not before Tony appeared, straddling his lap and pressing the now whole quarterstaff down on his shoulders.

Bucky panted heavily, then allowed his gaze to find Tony’s, who was also panting, with a victorious smile on his face. He tried to squirm under him, but Tony had him pinned there by all the strength that was left in him. A few bits of his hair hung over his forehead, sticking to sweat slick skin, and Bucky felt a brief urge to tuck it back for him. It would have been possible if his arms weren’t pinned, but his fingers did lightly graze the side of Tony’s legs. Tony pulled the staff away from Bucky’s shoulders, before leaning back slightly and running his fingers through his hair.

From where Bucky was lying, the view he had of Tony was almost obscene. He swallowed thickly, and tried to not make it obvious that his cheeks were turning a different shade from the rest of his skin. What felt like sparring almost felt like foreplay, with the way Tony was now looking down at him with hooded eyes. If only Sam’s voice wasn’t ringing in his head about keeping it professional and risking everything he’d worked so hard for.

“You win.”

Tony smiled broadly.

“See, more than just a suit.”

He pushed himself up onto his feet, while offering his hand to Bucky, helping him up from the floor and leaving them only standing a few inches apart.

“You owe me dinner, Bucky. Saturday night, six o’clock.”

The brunette’s hand slide down from Bucky’s shoulder to his arm, before he gave it a squeeze.

“You put up a good fight,” he commented.

“I tried,” Bucky chuckled.

He handed the quarterstaff back to Tony, then wandered over to a bench where his gloves and sweat towel was. Tony went to put the staffs away, as he peeked back over his shoulder to watch Bucky.

“Going somewhere?” he asked.

Bucky placed the towel over his shoulder and walked back in Tony’s direction.

“As a matter of fact, I am.”

“Sure you don’t want to work out some more?” Tony queried.

“How else am I gonna’ look nice for Saturday if I don’t go and find somethin’ nice to wear.”

Tony opened his mouth to speak, but closed it shortly after.

“What were you gonna’ say?” Bucky sighed.

“Well, I could come with you.”

“Sure, why not,” he replied, with a lazy shrug.

“You’re sure?”

Bucky gave him smile and an affirming nod.

“You can tell me what looks good and what doesn’t.”

If Tony’s smirk was anything to go by, Bucky knew he’d greatly piqued his interest.

“Bucky...you just read my mind.”

* * *

“Honestly, I’m really clumsy. I was always fallin’ on my ass as a kid and one time at work we had some big name client...and I walked directly into a refrigerator.”

On Saturday night, Tony and Bucky were enjoying dinner at a quaint Italian restaurant in Brooklyn, not too far from where Bucky lived. Bucky was sharing every embarrassing, yet funny moment in his life, in favour of hearing Tony laugh. He'd grown to love Tony's laugh, and always sought out to tell a joke or two to make it happen. He wasn't even sure if they were on a date or not, but it sure as hell felt like one.

Tony was too busy trying not to choke on or spit out his wine, to notice the way Bucky was staring at him. Bucky knew rules were being broken, big time, but his emotions were always a bigger player in his life over judgement. If he could keep quiet about it, things may fly under the radar back at S.H.I.E.L.D. As much as he hated to lie to his friends, he wanted to savour every moment with Tony. It'd been a long time since he'd felt drawn to someone romantically, yet he'd never quite felt anything like how he did with _him._

“I would've paid to see that,” Tony laughed.

“I can reenact it if you want.”

Tony's eyes crinkled at the corners as he smiled back at the brunette.

“It's alright, I'm sure I'll see it one day when we’re together,” he said.

Bucky's brow rose slightly and Tony tried to hide the blush on his cheeks behind his wine glass.

“Sorry, that sounded really forward. Makes it sound like you’re living in my pocket.”

The brunette elicited a soft laugh, then reached for Tony’s hand across the table, lacing their fingers together tightly.

“I like spendin’ time with you Tony,” Bucky whispered.

Tony placed his wine glass down on the table, before resting his other hand over Bucky’s.

“Likewise.”

“Charming as ever,” he teased.

“I figured after the relationships I’ve been in I’d be used to the whole dating thing. But I’m not. It still seems new to me.”

Bucky smiled shyly.

“This is a date now huh?”

“Bucky, I don’t lie about being attracted to people,” Tony admitted.

“I just...didn’t think it’d happen this quick.”

“Well, I always told myself that you can’t put a timestamp on attraction and feelings,” he said.

“That’s good advice to live by.”

Tony gently rubbed his thumb over Bucky’s knuckles, his eyes downcast at their entwined fingers.

“I don’t know what it is about you Bucky. You’re different.”

“Bad different?” Bucky joked, as Tony struggled to hold back a laugh.

“No, definitely a good different.”

“I sure hope so,” he drawled.

Bucky and Tony pulled their hands away shortly after a long period of staring into each other’s eyes, savouring the ambience around them that only added to the moment. Both of them went back to finishing off the desserts they’d gotten over fifteen minutes ago, thankfully not ones that would’ve melted overtime. Bucky finished his dessert off with the last mouthful of red wine in his glass, a hushed, satisfied hum following after. Tony caught the attention of a passing waiter, asking for the bill, before he reached into his pocket for his wallet.

“Hey, I’m buyin’ remember.”

Tony clucked his tongue and shook his head.

“Don’t worry about it, we’re on a date.”

Bucky huffed out a grunt as he got his wallet out and placed some money down on the table, then slid it across to Tony.

“At least let me pay for the two bottles of wine.”

“Fine. But I’m not letting you away with it next time,” Tony snarked.

“Who says there’s gonna’ be a next time,” Bucky retorted.

“You’re killin’ me Barnes,” the brunette muttered.

As Tony handed the bill back to the waiter, Bucky lightly brushed his leg against Tony’s, causing him to gasp softly. Bucky smirked behind his hand and pulled his leg back, much to the disappointment on Tony’s face.

“Ready to go?”

Bucky nodded.

“Let’s go,” he said.

Tony sidled up beside Bucky to rest his hand on the other’s lower back, as they exited the restaurant with smiles on their faces. Bucky shucked his jacket on and let his arm fall around Tony’s shoulder, fingers lightly grazing the brunette’s jawline.

“I had a really good time.”

“So did I,” Tony replied, grinning happily.

Bucky grinned back at him, before looking down at the ground as he scuffed the toe of his shoe on the concrete.

“Listen, Tony-” Bucky paused, to glance back at him. “...y’know I come back home on weekends. And I kinda’ want to spend more time with you. So I was wonderin’ if you wanted to come back to my place,” he added.

“Bucky, that sounds like a great idea,” the brunette said.

Bucky’s hand slide down Tony’s shoulder to rub his arm tenderly.

“My apartment is two streets away, won’t take long to get there.”

He dropped his arm to his side to start walking, but not before Tony grabbed his arm and drew him back.

“Wait.”

The distance between them was at its minimum, a distance close enough for Bucky to lean down and kiss Tony, or vice versa. Yet, before Bucky could even process that action, which he desired to take, Tony spoke up.

“I want to show you something.”

Bucky tried to hide his disappointment, only to raise his brow in curiosity when Tony unbuttoned two buttons on his shirt, to reveal his arc reactor.

“Tony what are you-”

“Watch,” Tony interrupted.

Tendrils of fluid material began to spread over Tony’s body, starting from his chest, then moving outwards to his upper body. Bucky gaped at the brunette as he held his hand up to Tony’s, feeling the material move against the palm of his hand. It moved further down to the lower half of Tony’s body, encasing him like a cocoon would to a caterpillar before it became a butterfly. The iconic hot-rod red started to make an appearance, and Bucky knew right then that _this,_ was another form of an Iron Man suit. Only difference was it was as if the suit constructed itself on Tony’s skin, unlike anything Bucky had seen before.

“Holy shit…” Bucky breathed out.

“Pretty impressive huh?”

Tony’s tinny voice was like music to Bucky’s ears when he looked up to see the Iron Man faceplate.

“This is nanotech isn’t it?” he asked.

“You know about nanotech?”

Bucky ran his hands over the armour.

“Yeah, big science and technology buff as a kid. Learnt everythin’ I could about it. Didn’t think I’d ever see it up close.”

“It’s a little more advanced and flexible for use,” Tony stated.

“Colour me impressed Stark, this is...incredible.”

“Hm, and I didn’t just show you it for nothing,” he murmured.

“What?” Bucky blurted out.

“Hold on tight.”

Tony stepped forward, before wrapping his arm tightly around Bucky’s waist, the realisation hitting him in the form of deer in the headlight eyes as they soared into the sky.

“Tony!” he yelled.

The brunette could feel the wind rushing past him while he clung to Tony, watching the buildings below him become farther and farther away. He felt Tony slow down, as they stopped high above the city, hovering idly and taking in the picturesque view. Bucky could see _everything,_ not even Stark Tower could give off as good a view to what he was seeing.

“What do you think?”

Bucky’s hand travelled down to Tony’s chest before he leant in, pressing a delicate kiss against Tony’s faceplate, as his eyes fell closed. He heard Tony exhale slowly, then opened his eyes to see the faceplate gone and Tony staring back at him, his pupils slightly dilated.

Suddenly, Tony’s lips met Bucky’s halfway in a chaste kiss, his free hand moving up to cup the brunette’s cheek. Bucky snaked his arm around the back of Tony’s neck, letting his fingers comb through soft strands of hair. The pair both sighed into the kiss, before angling their heads to deepen the kiss, lips parting in sync when they found what was comfortable for both of them. Tony’s other hand gripped onto Bucky’s hip, drawing him closer to his chest, the warmth radiated off both of them.

They only parted from the kiss for air, until Bucky was leaning in for more, stealing every spare second that he could to kiss him. Tony pulled away after a few more minutes, forehead pressing against Bucky’s as he panted heavily. Bucky let out a breathy chuckle and drew his bottom lip in with his teeth, eyes fluttering open to look at the brunette. He brushed his thumb across Tony’s bottom lip, then followed Tony’s movements, watching him kiss the palm of his metal hand, with the his fingers wrapping around Bucky’s own.

“Wow…” Tony whispered.

“Was that okay?”

“More than okay,” he exhaled breathlessly.

Bucky smiled contently.

“As much as I love lookin’ at all this. I’m gettin’ kinda’ cold.”

Tony nodded as his faceplate reappeared and he flew downward, closer to the street. He counted the two streets that Bucky had mentioned, before stopping above an apartment building.

“Mine’s the one with the plants on the balcony,” Bucky said.

“Here we are.”

Bucky’s grip on Tony loosened when his feet touched the ground, the dim light of his bedroom seeping out onto the balcony. Tony lowered himself down too, his armour disappearing slowly to leave him in his clothes again. He approached Bucky, who was busy getting the right key for the door, and rested his hand on the brunette’s waist. Bucky inhaled sharply at the sensation of Tony’s breath ghosting on his neck, then the tender touch of his lips on the edge of his jaw.

“Impatient,” he muttered.

Tony purred in Bucky’s ear.

“I see something I want.”

Bucky swiftly turned around and stole a kiss from Tony.

“So do I, but I can’t open the door with you distractin’ me.”

The brunette held his hands up in surrender.

“I’ll be good.”

Bucky’s scoff was enough for Tony to know he didn’t believe him in the slightest. Because as soon as the door was open, Tony was crowding Bucky against the wall, sporting a mischievous grin on his face.

“I knew you were gonna’ do that,” Bucky crooned.

“What’re we going to do about that hm?”

Bucky started walking backwards into the room, while tugging on Tony’s tie, dragging him in with him.

“I got a little somethin’ in mind, ain’t need to worry about a thing...”

* * *

Early the next morning, Bucky's bedroom was filled with the sounds of laboured breathing as well as two adults _giggling_ like idiots. Bucky rolled off of Tony's lap and onto his back, sinking into his memory foam mattress with a sigh. He turned his head to the side to look at Tony, who had the biggest smile on his face.

“Damn, some way to wake up in the mornin’,” Bucky mumbled, sleepily.

“They don't call it an early rise for nothing.”

Bucky narrowed his eyes at Tony before breaking down into fits of laughter.

“That was terrible!” he exclaimed.

“Still made you laugh.”

Tony moved around until he was lying on his side, propping his elbow up as he rested his head on his hand. He held his other hand out to Bucky, who took it, then pulled Tony closer. The brunette kissed Tony chastely, then brushed their noses together.

“Last night was amazin’.”

“Mm, you were looking amazing lying on this bed, honey,” Tony soothed.

Bucky bit down on his bottom lip to hide a smirk.

“Tony.”

“No pet names? That's completely fine with me,” he said.

“No, babe, I love them. Just...not used to real nice compliments.”

Tony pushed some of Bucky’s hair behind his ear.

“You’re gorgeous, so it might be something you need to get used to.”

“Ain’t gonna’ complain about that,” Bucky hummed.

“C’mere.”

Bucky closed the distance between them as he allowed his fingers to dance down Tony’s chest, before coming to rest against the arc reactor. Tony’s hand wandered down Bucky’s hip to his thigh, where he rubbed small circles on his bare skin, drawing a sigh from him. He smiled into the kiss, and moved Bucky’s thigh up to sit on top of his own, prompting Bucky to pull away.

“I love how your hands feel,” he purred.

Tony peppered kisses down Bucky’s neck, then teasingly bit down on a soft spot.

“I love how _you_ feel.”

All of a sudden Bucky’s phone started ringing on the bedside table. He groaned and lifted himself up onto his elbows, noticing his phone was sitting over on Tony’s side.

“Could you see who that is?”

Tony rolled onto his back and picked up Bucky’s phone to look at the caller ID.

“It’s Steve,” he said.

“Ugh, he probably needs somethin’.”

“Let’s see,” Tony replied, as he swiped the green icon on the screen.

“Tony,” Bucky hissed, lightly shoving him with a snort.

_“Hello? Buck?”_

“I’m sorry, Bucky can’t come to the phone right now, he’s in bed with a genius.”

“Gimme that,” the brunette grumbled, snatching the phone from Tony’s hand. “Steve, hey,” he greeted.

_“Buck, please don’t tell me that’s who I think it is.”_

Bucky looked over at Tony who was wiggling his eyebrows at him, making him clamp his hand over his mouth to stifle a laugh.

“What do you want Steve?”

_“Really? Avoidin’ the subject. Just get over here Buck, we need your weekly report on Tony.”_

“Fine, I’ll be there soon.”

_“Twenty minutes.”_

With an exasperated sigh, Bucky the ended call and tossed his phone to the side.

“I gotta’ go see Steve,” he muttered.

Tony worried his lip between his teeth.

“You’re not in trouble are you?”

“No, it’s just some paperwork bullshit that’s botherin’ him. I’ll probably be back at noon,” Bucky explained.

“Great, how does lunch sound?”

Bucky grinned slightly and pecked Tony on the lips.

“Sounds perfect.”

The brunette threw the sheets back that were laying across his waist, then swung his legs over the bed, arms stretching upwards as he yawned. He stood up and sauntered over to the doorway of the bathroom, before glancing back over his shoulder at Tony.

“I gotta’ shower.”

In response, Tony nodded as he leant back against the pillows.

“And you’re gonna’ save water with me…” Bucky suggested, with a wink.

Tony had never gotten out of a bed so hastily in his life.

* * *

S.H.I.E.L.D was generally quiet on a Sunday, which didn’t come as a surprise to Bucky when he managed to walk through the lobby, without having to weave past other agents. He took the elevator up to where Steve’s office was, with five minutes out of the twenty minutes that Steve gave him to spare. Though, he was dreading even meeting with Steve in the first place after their phone call. Steve’s tone didn’t sound particularly amused when Bucky avoided the question about Tony. While he wasn’t obligated to tell him, he knew it wasn’t wise to lie to his best friend either.

The elevator came to a stop on the twelfth floor, as Bucky stepped out and headed straight for Steve’s office at the end of the hallway. He took a deep breath, then knocked on the door three times, before entering the room. Steve was leaning over his desk, with paperwork spread all over it, and brows knitted together in concentration. Bucky cleared his throat to gain the blonde’s attention, to which he was met with a neutral look, instead of a warm smile.

“Hey Buck.”

“Jeez, no hug or nothin’?” Bucky replied.

“I want you to tell me what’s goin’ on.”

“Don’t know what you’re talkin’ about,” he said.

Steve sighed and rested his hands on his hips.

“Don’t bullshit me Buck. Why did Tony Stark answer your phone this mornin’?”

Bucky stared back at Steve.

“‘Cause his phone was closest to him.”

“You’re full of shit. Are you sleepin’ with him?” Steve asked.

The brunette swallowed thickly and clenched his jaw, knowing well enough that he couldn’t walk his way out of this one.

“...yes.”

“Oh c’mon Buck, no!” the blonde exclaimed, as he turned away from his desk.

“What? Were you expectin’ me to say no?” Bucky bit back.

Steve spun around to face Bucky, with one hand raking through his hair.

“Of course I was. Bucky, you were warned about this.”

“What did you expect me to do! Act like I don’t care about him! Make myself into some...emotionless robot!” he yelled.

“I expected better from you!”

Steve’s words stung as Bucky breathed in sharply, trying to blink away the tears brimming in the corners of his eyes.

“I get it. You warned me, so did Sam. But you can’t control your feelings sometimes.”

“He’s a client Bucky, what were you thinkin’!” Steve spat.

“I wasn’t thinkin’! Y’know why? ‘Cause this is the happiest I’ve felt in a long time, it’s just unfortunate it had to be a client!”

“Not long ago you practically hated the guy!” he argued.

“Things changed Steve! Alright? Hate is a strong word and I didn’t hate him, I disliked the early mornin’ wake ups! But then _you_ said I should take into consideration how Tony must be feelin’ with his anxiety and his PTSD! And I did! We started becoming closer once we shared stories and confided in each other! That’s called a connection, you understand each other! I’m pretty sure you and Sam are like that too!” Bucky protested.

The blonde shook his head.

“Don’t drag Sam and I into this. Unlike you, we keep work and our personal lives separate.”

“That is a low blow Steve, real fuckin’ low. There’s no difference!” he shouted.

“If Tony got hurt that would be on you ‘cause you’d be too busy fawnin’ over him to see the danger around you!”

Bucky slammed his metal hand down on the table, knocking several things over on Steve’s desk.

“Fuck you Rogers! I’d protect him with my damn life!”

Suddenly, the door to Steve’s office slammed loudly.

“What’s going on? Everyone in the training room can hear you two arguing.”

Bucky turned around to see Natasha standing in the office, her arms crossed over her chest.

“Nat.”

Natasha took one look at Bucky’s tear stained cheeks, before she walked over to him and pulled him in for a hug. Bucky wrapped his arms around her, breathing shakily against her shoulder while she rubbed his back comfortingly. She glared at Steve and mouthed _‘what did you do’,_ only to have the blonde avert his gaze from her.

“You’re okay,” she soothed.

“Natasha, he’s sleeping with Stark,” Steve spoke up.

“Stop makin’ it sound bad,” Bucky ground out.

“Hey, shh,” Natasha said, after parting from the embrace.

“You heard what Sam said when he first asked Bucky to do this.”

Natasha wiped her thumb across Bucky’s cheek, then turned to Steve.

“Have you ever been in love Rogers?”

The blonde opened his mouth to speak, but quickly spared his words.

“You know _exactly_ what it’s like. Pining for someone you know you can’t have, but your emotions cloud everything else.”

“This was on a keep it professional basis,” Steve replied.

“Things happen Rogers. You and Sam didn’t have it easy when there was something going on between you two. That really is no different to how Bucky and Tony are. He’s your best friend, and you’re walking all over him.”

“You’re pretty sentimental about this,” he murmured.

“That’s what happens when you get married to the person you love,” she answered, sharply.

Steve looked over at Bucky.

“Buck, I didn't mean to upset you.”

Bucky scoffed while shaking his head.

“Save it Steve. You said what you wanted to say. And I don't wanna’ hear it anymore.”

Without another word, Bucky headed for the door as he wiped his sleeve over his eyes and sniffles loudly.

“Bucky I'm sorry!” Steve called out.

The brunette stopped after opening the door, his head hung, before he straightened himself up.

“No Steve, if you were sorry you wouldn't have said those things. I can't be around this self righteous asshole bullshit right now. You'll get your damn report by tonight, but I'm sendin’ it to Nat.”

“I-” the blonde flattered.

“Bye Steve.”

Steve visibly flinched when the door slammed again, as Bucky disappeared from view... _and didn't look back._

* * *

Everything happened too quickly for Bucky to even process his actions. What should’ve been a night for a good cause, turned into a dangerous situation. People were screaming in the main hall of the building, while Bucky had been preoccupied in the foyer. He wasn’t expecting to hear that a supposed ‘security guard’ at the charity event, had drawn his gun...and that Tony was their target.

The glass in Bucky’s hand slipped from his fingers and smashed on the floor, as he ran towards a sea of guests running from the room. He pushed past as many of them as he could, regardless of how overwhelmingly crowded it felt. His only objective was to get to Tony, to protect him like he agreed to do when he first accepted the undercover assignment. Not only that, the feelings he had for Tony played their part too. He’d rather risk his life and possibly die before anyone ever got to harm Tony.

“Get out of the way!”

Upon reaching the main hall, Bucky frantically searched the room for Tony.

“Tony!”

As guests continued to run for their lives, Bucky saw Tony through a gap in the crowd. The brunette was standing, motionless, his eyes locked on the attacker who was making his way towards him.

“ _Tony!_ ”

Tony turned his head to see Bucky running straight for him, catching the glimpse of a gun tucked away under the brunette’s suit jacket. But there was no time to wonder why he had one, before two gunshots echoed in the room and he was shoved to the ground. All he could hear was yelling of other security guards, as he hit the floor hard, wincing in pain when he fell on his arm awkwardly.

“Drop your weapon!”

In the midst of all the commotion, Tony quickly recovered, only to see Bucky lying on the ground, with bloody staining his hand.

“Oh god, no, no, no.”

He crawled across the floor to get to Bucky, immediately applying pressure to the gunshot wound in his shoulder.

“Hey, hey, hey. Don’t move okay.”

His gaze darted downward, where he saw blood seeping out across Bucky’s shirt from his abdomen, as he gasped shakily.

“I need some help over here!” he yelled.

Bucky was losing more blood at every second that ticked by, and Tony knew if he didn’t get attended to as fast as possible, he could go south.

“Tones!”

The brunette looked up to see Rhodey rushing over to him, relief washing over him at the sight of his best friend. Rhodey dropped down beside him, then took his jacket off, before bundling it together and putting pressure on Bucky’s abdomen. He cried out in pain through gritted teeth, as Tony’s free hand grasped Bucky’s, squeezing tightly.

“Bucky, you’re going to be fine alright?”

Bucky swallowed thickly and gripped Tony’s hand tighter.

“I’m sorry.”

“Stop it,” Tony whispered.

“Had to protect you.”

“I know, I know,” he said.

The brunette breathed out shakily, as he looked down at his bloody hand.

“It’s bad isn’t it?” Bucky asked.

“It’s not bad, you’re not dying on me Barnes!”

“Tony, we really need to get him to hospital. The pressure on the wounds is helping, but it’s soaking through pretty quickly,” Rhodey interjected.

“What the hell do you think I’m waiting for! If I move, he’s going to bleed more from his shoulder!”

“Tony, I’m feelin’ a little faint...” the brunette murmured.

“Stay awake, please,” Tony begged.

“I can’t…”

“C’mon, keep your eyes open for me, honey. Stay with me,” he encouraged.

Slowly, Bucky’s vision began to tunnel, as he tried to speak, but it only came out slurred. The pain from the wounds, and the sight of all the blood he was losing or had lost, took a toll on Bucky’s body. Until all he could hear before he slipped into an unconscious state, was Tony’s panicked voice, shouting his name.

“ _Bucky!_ ”

* * *

Light flooded Bucky’s vision when he gradually opened his eyes, taking in the white ceiling and sky blue walls. He heard the steady rhythm of his heart beating from the heart monitor beside him, wires sticking out from under the gown he was wearing. Then there was the pain he felt, mostly around his shoulder and abdomen, which was dull but most likely from the effects of pain relief. But it was still a reminder of what he did the previous night, taking those bullets for Tony, regardless if he survived or not.

He groaned as he pushed himself upright on the hospital bed, arms shaking slightly. His eyes felt so heavy that he had to resort to rubbing them with the back of his hand, before blinking several times. It helped, only a little, but it was enough for him to become more aware of his surroundings, as well as who. Because when he glanced over to the far corner of the room, he saw Tony, leaning against the wall, with a folder tucked under his arm. The one thing that sent Bucky’s mind reeling, was the blank, emotionless look on Tony’s face.

“When were you going to tell me?”

“Tell you what?” Bucky questioned.

“That you’re working for the frickin’ Strategic Homeland Intervention Enforcement and Logistics Division.”

Tony stepped forward and threw the folder down on the bed, as some of the contents spilled out of it. Bucky reached over to pick it up, before opening it to see his S.H.I.E.L.D file, carrying every piece of important data about him.

“Tony I can explain,” he said.

“You don’t have to. I’ve seen enough,” Tony replied.

“It’s complicated.”

“Really? How is it? You’re a S.H.I.E.L.D agent, you never were a PA,” he stated.

“It was an undercover job.”

Tony shook his head.

“You lied! Not only to me but to Pepper!”

“I didn’t discuss anythin’ with Pepper,” Bucky muttered.

“No but you’re boss did! And it’s worse that you even agreed to it! I guess it should’ve been obvious when you knew about nanotech, S.H.I.E.L.D knows a lot about advanced science and technology. But what made pieced it all together for me was when I recalled seeing a gun holstered under your suit last night. A bodyguard would carry one, not a personal assistant.”

“I didn’t want it to end up like this!” the brunette exclaimed.

“Shit, Bucky, it’s a little late for that! What exactly were you working undercover for anyway!” Tony spat.

Bucky’s jaw clenched.

“Concerns for your health and safety…”

“So it was just a pity party huh? I may have gone overboard, at my last birthday. But I was dying! Palladium poisoning. I thought I may as well go out with a bang since this could be my last birthday ever. But I’m here, I fixed it, I’m better. Sometimes I have my days when I think about being tortured and held against my will by terrorists, and I can’t always fix that. But I try my hardest,” he explained.

“I’m so sorry, Tony.”

Tony averted his gaze and crossed his arms over his chest.

“Tell me...this thing between us. Was that all a lie too?”

“No!” Bucky protested. “God, Tony, I might’ve lied about my current job, but my feelings for you were never a game,” Bucky answered.

“Why am I finding it hard to believe you…”

“I never wanted to hurt you Tony, everythin’ we shared, together, that was real. Please believe me,” he pleaded.

“You were with me the whole time...you saw that I was changing, for the better,” Tony whispered.

He put his attention back on Bucky, with tears welling in his reddened eyes.

“I did. And I still am seein’ you change for the better.”

“Bucky, I poured my heart out to you. Told you things that I never usually talk about. I trusted you,” the brunette choked out.

Bucky looked down at his hands, as a tear fell from his cheek and splattered against the pages on his file. He wiped his hand over both cheeks, sniffling loudly, before he swallowed down the lump in his throat.

“You mean a lot to me Tony.”

Tony shook his head again in denial.

“I’m tellin’ you the truth!” Bucky cried.

“Stop! Just stop!”

The brunette covered his eyes with his hand, before a sob escaped his mouth and his shoulders trembled violently. Bucky hung his head, while he blinked away tears, the bedsheet held tightly in his hands.

“Tell me what to do to fix this…” he spoke up.

Tony laughed dryly.

“You’re unbelievable. This isn’t fixable. You fucking lied to me. And I thought we actually had something. I’ve never felt as happy as I did when I was with you. Now I feel like I don’t even know you.”

Bucky muffled a sob behind his hand.

“I’m sorry.”

“No you’re not. If you were you would’ve told me who you really were, regardless of whether you got told to keep quiet about it or not. I don’t like being mislead Bucky, I expect trust. You’ve broken that. You-” Tony paused.

“No…”

“...you broke my heart,” he sobbed, brokenly.

Tony’s breathing started to become laboured, while he rested his hand against his chest, as sweat broke out on his skin. He could feel the anxiety attack coming full force and unrelenting.

“I need- _god_ -I gotta’ get out of here.”

Without even a second thought, Tony hurried to the door, aimlessly letting it swing open and hit the wall.

“Tony don’t go!” Bucky called out.

The door closed with a soft click, leaving Bucky alone in the room, with his file still spread across the bed. He took one look at it, then shoved it off the bed, yelling in anger as the papers fell to the floor.

“Idiot!”

Bucky dropped his head into his hands, fingers grasping his hair, his breathing hoarse from yelling and crying. He fell back on the bed, suffering through the pain that stabbed him in the shoulder and his right side, breaking down into uncontrollable sobbing.

_Nothing could have prepared him for losing the one person who finally brought light into his life._

* * *

Weeks passed by for Tony like any other wee...only they didn’t feel the same. He occupied himself with work, as well as spending time with Pepper and Rhodey. But nothing could take his mind off Bucky, not even for five minutes out of his day. Bucky attempted to leave him messages over several days, yet Tony always left them unanswered. And eventually they all stopped, which still didn’t help, because then Tony began to worry. As far as he knew, Steve and Natasha tried to keep a tight lid on the situation, without much success.

Which was why Tony found himself standing inside the lobby at S.H.I.E.L.D, trying to will himself to give his side of the story. Bucky couldn’t take all of the blame, it took two to make a relationship, and Tony had as much involvement in it as Bucky did. While he slipped under the radar, Bucky had to take the full brunt of Tony ending their blossoming relationship, along with the consequences regarding his job as an agent. It wasn’t fair, and Tony constantly argued with himself that he _had_ to fix this.

He was issued with a guest ID, then escorted over to the elevators, where he stated that he could manage on his own. As he waited for the elevator to take him to the correct floor, many questions swirled inside his mind. _Would Sam listen to his plea? Would he bump into Bucky on the way? If he did, what would he say?_ It was a long, daunting three minutes inside the elevator, before it came to a stop on the sixteenth floor.

“You’re a goddamn idiot!”

Tony followed the sound of raised voices to a meeting room, where one of the doors was left ajar. He stood behind the door, then peered inside to see Bucky standing over by the window, with his hands clasped behind his back. Another figure walked into his line of sight, who Tony could only guess was Sam, the director of S.H.I.E.L.D, the one he’d come to talk to.

“Sam, it wasn’t supposed to be like this.”

“You’re damn right it wasn’t! What were you thinkin’ man?” Sam said.

“I already argued with Steve about this. The damage is done. I can’t change what happened, I couldn’t reserve my feelings ‘cause that isn’t who I am.”

“You had a job. When I handed it over to you, you said you could handle it,” he muttered.

“Maybe I misjudged myself a little,” Bucky replied.

Sam shook his head.

“You misjudged yourself a lot.”

Bucky tilted his head up and stared at Sam.

“All Tony wanted was somebody to care for him. Yeah, he has Rhodey and Pepper, but there’s only so much they can give him. He needed a connection with somebody that he hadn’t felt in a long time. We opened up to each other, and for me I felt like I’d finally found happiness in my life again. There was always somethin’ missing, now that’s gone ‘cause I screwed up,” the brunette explained.

Sam sighed as he sat down in one of the chairs.

“You ignored strict guidelines not to instigate any kind of relationship that would overstep the boundaries.”

Bucky scoffed, before turning to glance at Sam.

“No, I followed that guideline for the first few weeks. But things changed, it’s what happens when two people feel drawn to each other. There’s no stoppin’ it, you’d know all about it. You came to me when you wanted to know things about Steve.”

“I did. But Steve wasn’t a client. And we didn’t pursue anythin’ when we were working. There’s a big difference Bucky, I’m sorry,” Sam murmured.

The brunette rested his hands on the table, with clenched fists.

“Y’know, I don’t regret it for a second! But nobody wants to listen to me!”

“This wouldn’t go down well with the council,” he added.

“Screw the council! They’re hypocrites!” Bucky protested.

For a second, a small smirk spread on Sam’s face, as if he was in agreement with Bucky’s statement.

“You know I can’t sweep this under the rug.”

Bucky exhaled deeply, as he stood up straight.

“I know…”

Sam pointed to an empty space on the table.

“Agent Barnes, I’m suspending you effective immediately. I’ll need your badge, ID card and gun.”

The anger finally showed itself across Bucky’s face, like a switch being flicked in his head.

“For how long?” he questioned.

“Can’t say.”

Bucky’s jaw tightened, before he pulled his badge and ID out from his jacket, carelessly tossing them on the table. He then reached for his gun and placed it on the table, showing no sign of wanting to fight any further. Sam nodded in acknowledgement of Bucky’s compliant attitude. Yet, even though he seemed against the idea of seeing one of his best agents leave, he had a job as the director of S.H.I.E.L.D to resolve a situation before it got worse.

“You’re dismissed.”

Tony watched Bucky storm out of the room, exiting through the doors at the other end of the room. He headed in the direction of the elevator, his entire body shaking with rage as he forcefully pressed the button to open the doors. When they opened, Steve was standing inside, with paperwork tucked under his arm. But he dropped the paperwork on the floor, in favour of embracing Bucky when the brunette threw his arms around him. Tony knew then that Bucky was in good hands, the support of a best friend was an all too familiar feeling to him, especially in times of need.

After the doors closed and the elevator started descending to the lobby floor, he knocked on the door to the meeting room, then let himself in. Sam looked up from his hands where he’d rested his head, before standing up quickly at Tony’s presence. He greeted him with a firm handshake, squeezing tight as if he’d known Tony was behind the door the whole time. It did put Tony at ease to be greeted so warmly, he’d dreaded even showing up to talk with Sam.

“Mr Stark.”

“Please, call me Tony,” he said.

“I was told I’d be expecting you. What was it you wanted to discuss?”

“I wanted to discuss Bu-uh...Agent Barnes,” Tony answered.

“How much of our conversation did you hear?” Sam queried.

Tony smiled tiredly.

“Enough.”

“Bucky’s only going to be suspended for a few weeks at most,” Sam sighed.

“Well, he is your best agent, isn’t he?”

Sam nodded.

“I had him up for a promotion too, to be a commander like Natasha.”

“Some of this is my fault,” Tony muttered.

“How so?”

“Look, I had as much of a part in this as Bucky did. If I’d known that he was a S.H.I.E.L.D agent, it never would’ve happened. It wasn’t exactly right that he was supposedly my PA as well, but...he became like a friend to me, he seemed like that more than he did a PA,” he stated.

“We try not to mix personal relationships with work relationships,” Sam replied.

“See, you seem to be going in a loop with that statement. Because when Bucky wasn’t working for me on weekends, that’s when we grew the closest. We bonded, and you really can’t blame that all on him. I understand that it was an undercover mission, but I think it was the wrong choice. Had you brought him in just as he was it probably wouldn’t have become such a mess.”

“You say it never would’ve happened. But I think you still would’ve developed feelings for Bucky,” he pointed out.

“Point taken. But it would have been outside work, like you said, you try not to mix personal and work relationships together.”

Sam sighed deeply as he clasped his hands together.

“I get where you’re coming from. I can’t deny that I haven’t been tempted sometimes when Steve and I were starting out as a couple. I’ve made a mistake, and I’m sorry for that.”

“Glad we’re on the same page. Now tell me, how can I fix this for Bucky?” Tony asked.

“I’m not able to change anything in regards to his suspension. Just to give him space and time to get back into the right state of mind. But I’m still willing to give Bucky the promotion.”

“Please, do. He’s so committed to his work,” the brunette hummed.

“He seems pretty committed to you too,” Sam commented.

Tony chuckled.

“Yeah, I...need to fix that too. He meant a lot to me, still does. It takes effort, but I want to work on that with him.”

Sam grinned widely.

“I think you should go for it man. He isn’t your PA anymore, you’re not his client, it won’t be so...complicated now,” he suggested.

“Thank you, Director Wilson.”

A hearty laugh fell from Sam’s mouth.

“You’re welcome, Mr Stark.”

“Anyway...I should go, things to sort out,” Tony uttered.

“Good luck, Tony.”

The brunette shook Sam’s hand once more, before departing. Upon making his way back to the elevator, he fished his phone out of his pocket, tapped a number on the keypad, then held it to his ear.  

“Rhodey, yeah...I need you buddy.”

* * *

“Are you sure about this Tones?”

Tony glanced out at the open water of Long Island, as Rhodey drove down a quiet stretch of road.

“It’s been three weeks since I spoke to Sam about Bucky. Then it took another five days to figure out where he was.”

“I’m guessing Bucky wanted more time?” Rhodey asked.

“Sam said he could work to shorten his suspension. But when I met with Steve and Natasha they told me that Bucky wanted to pay his dues. Apparently he hasn’t spoken to them much since then.”

“He’ll be takin’ time for himself. To figure things out y’know?” he said.

“That’s what I’m afraid of...I hope he’s alright,” Tony replied.

Rhodey nodded slowly.

“So you’re not having second thoughts?”

“No. I’ve thought enough, it’s time to actually do something. I care about Bucky, and in a situation like this he deserves a second chance,” the brunette explained.

“You always did have a good moral compass man.”

Tony’s mouth curved up into a smile, while he looked down at his phone to read the GPS.

“The house should be at the end of this road.”

“I read on the description that it has a private beach access,” Rhodey chuckled.

“Yeah, I think that’s probably what drew Bucky to it.”

“Listen, Tony, whatever happens, I’m always here for you, so is Pepper,” he assured him.

“I know. I don’t know what I’d do without either of you,” Tony said.

As they approached the end of the street, the reality began to sink in for Tony. He couldn’t live knowing that he and Bucky ended on bad terms, it wasn’t what he wanted. Truth be told, he missed Bucky for the three weeks that he gave himself to recover from the mess that it became. There were things he wanted to say, things that he had to get off his chest before it drove him insane. And just maybe, Bucky would be in favour of a fresh start with him.

“We’re here.”

Tony rolled down the window to get a better look at the house, immediately hearing the sound of crashing waves in the background.

“Listen to that sound Rhodey,” he sighed, contently.

“Remember when we met and we went to the beach a lot.”

The brunette smirked.

“Remember when we went skinny dipping that one time and you thought something touched your leg and it was just seaweed.”

“Oh my god, don’t remind me,” Rhodey groaned.

“The look on your face was hilarious.”

“Says the one who stood on a counter when he thought there was a spider but it was the top off a tomato,” he chided.

“When you don’t get a close look at them, they look like spiders!” Tony exclaimed.

Rhodey snorted and clapped his hand down on Tony’s shoulder.

“Don’t try to get out of that one.”

The brunette’s smile widened, as he reached into the back seat to grab his duffel bag, before pulling Rhodey into a warm embrace.

“Thanks buddy, I owe you one,” he chimed.

“Just call me if things don’t work out and you need me to come and get you. I’m gonna’ check into a hotel for the night since it’s gonna’ get dark soon.”

Tony nodded and opened the door, then turned back to look at Rhodey.

“I’ll remember.”

He stepped out of the car, closed the door behind him, and took a moment to check out the house. It looked homey, and peaceful, given that the next house was further down the street. Tony swung his duffel bag over his shoulder, then walked over to the door, while having an internal conversation with himself. _You can do this_ he thought.

“Here we go,” he breathed out, after taking a deep breath.

Tony knocked on the door three times, before stepping back a little, as it opened with a soft creak. His eyes widened a fraction when it fully opened and Bruce Banner stood in the doorway, looking a little tired.

“Bruce?”

“Tony? I-hi,” Bruce greeted.

“You own this place?”

“Yeah, I rent it out whenever I’m here. I didn’t realise it was you that was coming here though,” he said.

“It’s been awhile since I last saw you,” Tony replied.

“Two years.”

“Wow. Long time,” he chuckled.

Bruce smiled softly.

“I just woke up from a nap, so I’m not all here.”

Tony snorted loudly.

“I figured.”

“Anyway, come on in,” Bruce drawled, holding the door open wider.

“Actually, I just want to be clear on something first.”

“Uh, sure,” he mumbled.

“Is Bucky Barnes here? The only reason I rented out a room was to come and see him. It’s...a really long and complicated story. I can tell you about it, but I just want to know if he’s here. I don’t know if I’ve got the wrong house or not. I don’t even know what I’m doing,” Tony rambled.

“Tony, hey. Calm down, breathe.”

The brunette exhaled shakily and swallowed thickly.

“Yeah, you’re right. I’m okay,” he said.

Bruce stepped forward and guided Tony into the house, before closing the door quietly behind him.

“Bucky’s here. He’s down on the beach, that’s where he’s been most of the time since he got here. He doesn’t talk much though.”

Tony dropped his bag down on the floor, rested his hands on his hips and hung his head.

“That doesn’t sound like him. I’ve really messed up.”

“Tony, what did you do?” Bruce asked.

“Long story short, he’s a S.H.I.E.L.D agent who was undercover as my new PA and things happened between us. We got close, but then I found out he was working for them, and I just felt angry that I was lied to. So I ended it.”

“But now you regret it,” he murmured.

“Yes! I regret it every single day. Because he was the greatest thing that’s happened to me in a long time. And I screwed up by letting him go,” Tony admitted.

Bruce fidgeted with the sleeves of his shirt.

“He did talk about somebody that he said he’d hurt. Only he didn’t mention a name, and I didn’t ask because I didn’t feel like it was my business.”

“Did he say anything else?” the brunette queried.

“Uh, he said he wished he could fix it, take it all back and start over. I’m not great at reading people Tony. But I’d say that he misses you.”

Tony pinched the bridge of his nose tightly.

“I need to see him.”

“Just head out the backdoor, there’s a sign that’ll direct you to the beach. It’s not far, but just watch your step, there’s an uneven bit. It’s best if you stick to the right side of the path,” Bruce instructed.

“Thanks Bruce.”

“No problem Tony,” he said.

After Bruce left the room, Tony headed over to the backdoor, discarding his jackets, shoes and socks along the way. He walked out into the garden, which opened up to a sandy pathway, directing him towards the beach. As he walked, thousands of questions threw themselves at him, but Tony tried his best to block them out. He wasn’t going to worry himself about what he was going to say to Bucky. All he wanted was for it to come naturally, with no brainstorming or overthinking bothering him.

Upon reaching the end of the path, Tony gasped softly at the sight, picturesque and calm like he remembered it. The waves rolled across the shore, then drew back slowly, before a new wave took its place. Wave watching was Tony’s favourite thing about the beach, whenever he went there, he’d spend most of his time watching and thinking. Those were the times where all Tony had to worry about was handing in his work for an assignment. Now, he had so many other things to worry over.

Tony directed his attention to the left to see Bucky sitting down on the sand, with his arms resting on his bent knees. He stood for a moment to look at him, watching the wind blow strands of hair over his face, as he stared out at the ocean. Bucky appeared relaxed and at peace, which was all that Tony could have asked for. His greatest fear was showing up to the possibility of Bucky not coping well. So he stood for another minute, before deciding to approach Bucky, while calming his nerves at the same time.

“Hey you.”

Bucky whipped his head around, then pushed his sunglasses up on top of his head, his lips parting slightly in surprise.

“Tony.”

His voice cracked around his name and Tony couldn’t help but feel numb with guilt.

“Been awhile.”

The brunette managed a weak smile.

“Nearly a month,” he drawled.

“I missed you,” Tony blurted out.

Bucky laughed shakily as he looked away averted his gaze.

“I missed you too.”

Tony sat down beside Bucky, letting his toes wiggle into the sand, then looked back at Bucky.

“Is there where you’ve been the whole time?” he asked.

“Yeah...how’d you know I was here?”

The brunette traced a line in the sand, as he let out a sigh.

“I asked Steve and Natasha.”

“Guess they were worried about me, wonderin’ if I was okay,” Bucky muttered.

“Are you?”

“No. Not since you left,” he said.

Tony placed his hand on the back of Bucky’s neck, which caused the brunette to breath in sharply at the touch.

“Bucky I’m so sorry,” he replied.

“Nothin’ to be sorry for.”

“Just hear me out,” the brunette sighed.

Bucky gave him a small nod in response.

“I feel like I put all the blame on you, when I was also involved. Don’t try and argue with me about it, I pursued that relationship with you too. I didn’t even think of the consequences, even when all I knew you as, was my PA. Yes, I would’ve preferred for you to be honest with me, but I can understand you were only doing your job. And this time apart, it gave me a lot to think about. You were and are the best thing that’s come into my life Bucky. The last thing I want...is for us to not give this another shot, and for me to lose a chance at being with you, as you are now. This is a second chance, at something good, something special. If you’ll have me, because I need you.”

Bucky’s eyes were watery when Tony lifted his head to make eye contact with him.

“I don’t deserve a second chance with you. You’re amazin’ Tony, and I’ve been waitin’, hoping we could fix this.”

Tony dropped his hand down to Bucky’s back and wrapped his arm around him, before drawing him in close.

“C’mere.”

He held Bucky tightly to his chest, as the brunette choked on a sob, his hand sliding around to Tony’s back to grip onto his shirt. Tony buried his head into the crook of Bucky’s neck, breathed in deeply and blinked away tears that were resting on his eyelids. It felt right to have him there, in his arms, which brought back the memory of when they first slept together, comfortable in each other’s embrace.

“I love you,” Tony whispered.

Bucky pulled back from Tony to stare into his eyes.

“What did you say?”

Tony’s smile was tender as he cupped his hand under Bucky’s jaw, then caressed his thumb over the brunette’s cheek to wipe away a tear.

“I said I love you.”

Bucky surged forward to press his lips against Tony’s, to which he reciprocated. He tilted Bucky’s head to deepen the kiss, as they both breathed in sharply at the shock of kissing each other again. It felt like a fresh start, a reconciliation that neither of them were going to think twice about. So when they parted from the kiss, Bucky couldn’t help but chuckle, while trying to catch his breath. He smoothed his hand down the front of Tony’s shirt and grinned happily. Tony brushed his thumb over Bucky’s bottom lip, then leaned in for another, quick, chaste kiss.

“I love you too,” Bucky hummed, after Tony pulled away.

Tony pressed their foreheads together with a sigh.

“It feels good to hear you say that.”

“Yeah?” the brunette crooned.

“Oh yeah, I was going to feel like a dick if I blurted it out and it seemed too soon,” Tony retorted.

Bucky lowered his head to try and hide a laugh.

“It never would’ve been too soon.”

“How would you feel about me staying here for a few days?” he asked.

“Please... _stay._ ”

Tony planted a kiss on Bucky’s forehead.

“Of course.”

“You wanna’ go for a walk along the beach?” Bucky suggested.

“That sounds perfect.”

Bucky pushed himself up from the sand, then offered his hand to Tony. The brunette took it gratefully, before being hoisted up onto his feet, then brushed the sand off his jeans.

“Let’s go.”

Tony searched for Bucky’s hand and entwined their fingers, as the pair started their walk down the shoreline, with the sun setting on the horizon.

_Together._


End file.
